Time for a solo vacation!

Hey lovers,

I’m about to jet off on a week long vacation with my best friend. No, not Chris, my other best friend. 🙂 A few months ago, Chris went on a solo vacation and now I’m going on a girls trip!

I am just laying in bed & Chris is sleeping next to me, and thinking about my gratitude for this trip. (don’t worry by phone is on airplane mode, night mode, redlight mode, and I’m wearing blue light glasses) 😅 I feel so fortunate to have this opportunity and I know that a trip like this is something many people never get to do. I feel really blessed to have created a life where it’s possible. Also, I’m just so grateful, because I really need it. I feel this deep, almost primal instinct, that I need a week on the beach! So I am going to the beach. 🌴

I’ve never thought it was wierd when couples do things separately. On the contrary, even as a child, that would stick out to me and I always admired it. But I know a lot of people think it’s bizarre or almost wrong. I believe our western society has a tendency to allow relationships and marriage to hold us back. To cause us to put our plans on hold or just give up on them. We give up on motivation, drive and integrity to take care of ourselves & our desires. I think this pattern, that we’ve become so accustomed to is really sad and toxic to total wellbeing. I also don’t think anyone is unaware of this…whether it’s you, someone you know, or a story you’ve heard, you’re familiar. I don’t mean it as offensive to anyone, but just an observation. Hell, Chris and I have been there! But we’ve worked our butts off to be different and that stubborn gumption is why we have this platform today!

This pattern is a hard no for Chris & I in our relationship. Neither of us is willing to give up our lives, ourselves, or our desires. Nor does either of us want the other person to give up. There are habits we’ve had to alter for a healthy connection, but we’ve never sacrificed ourselves. We alway say that we’re the only people we know who’ve actually gotten younger, healthier, and more beautiful with age. Some of that is good genetics, sure, but most of it just that we keep trying and have never quit. It’s everything from exercise, eating well, and keeping our appearance up. Beyond that it’s taking time apart and one of those things is my vacation this week and doing self care for our souls.

Chris has this phrase….if it makes him healthier, wealthier, or wiser, he’s on board.

I love Chris and love being with him, but I also love myself. I love who I am, I”m proud of the woman I’ve become, and over the moon about where my life is going. As an introvert…I love being alone. That break is when I rejuvenate. It’s when I accomplish a ton, refresh and get inspired. What I gain and how I feel in that time can’t come any other way. This makes time apart critical to my health and happiness. And our individual health affects our relationships and partner’s health.

Like I said, I know people think it’s so weird that I’m going on vacation without my husband, but I think it’s cool! I LOVE seeing people who are in relationships still doing their thing and being themselves.

Being married or having a life partner or commitment to someone doesn’t mean you have to become one person.

Imagine how different your world would be, if all the people you can think of, who gave up, didn’t actually give up, but they stayed as driven and motivated. To make it better, the person they’re with actually made them better and a power duo. Imagine this for everyone in the world…

Wouldn’t the world be such a different place…??

Now I’m going to get on an airplane and spend a week away from my life partner. I’m so EXCITED!! I get so giddy thinking about being alone in the airport, spending my airplane ride in total peace, watching/listening/reading whatever I want, getting as many coffees as I want, and sitting in the sand for hours because it feeds my soul. Just hanging out with my bff, in our incredibly calm and peaceful way we both thrive in. Both of us have energizer bunny husbands 😂, we love them, but our friendship is really grounding. After all of that I will come home with a zest for my life, my business, my relationship, Chris, my marriage, and our partnership that, as I write this, I know it needs a little self-care.

I really don’t believe any of us actually want anything less than that. I’m not unique or special in my desires. What makes me different and makes me stand out is that I fight for it and never settle. I think all couples should take time apart and recalibrate. I think all people should have personal practices that they don’t let anyone interfere with. While a lot of my work and focus here is on relationships and intimacy I think there is a lot of power in attacking from both directions. Tremendous strength comes from knowing that your individuality is just as valuable as your togetherness.

​Much love,

Kate